Dark Moment!!

Iiisssshhhhh, this is my lowest moment ever in 2008!! Everything seem so wrong with my life. Today exam was the last shock that i could take. Everything exploded right after my exam. I could not even smile now. Where is that ever cheerful mitchy?? Where is that happy go lucky mitchy??? I guess he is somewhere hiding himself letting the other side of him out. Why everything went wrong this 2 days?? First of all, I got stuck outside of my house till 4 am because i forgot to bring my keys when i went out. I was rushing to king and pear prawn hse to cheer myself up. I knew something really was wrong when my chain broke this mornin. Now the coffin on my chain got no more door. Ishhh. Damn, i'm so down till 2 drops of tear came out from my eyes. Why 2 drops??? This is because i promise myself i wont cry because i am a man and a man dont cry. I wanted to post about my ending with that someone but i think that is no more important. This shock is even bigger than that.

For the first time i am in mmu, i totally got no confident in this exam. I tried my best to study. i tried so hard but first look at the paper, i knew that i am DOOM. Every fucking question is so so fucking hard. I only know how to do 1 question out of 5. Can u imagine that?? I cant!! Why like that?? Have i been playing too much?? Have my mind been on other things too much?? I dont know...

I always dont know about anything. I dont know why i am so stupid. I dont know why i cant even make someone happy. I dont know why i am like this. I dont know why i am typing this stupid post also. I only know that there are frens out there waiting to comfort me right now while i am closing myself behind the 4 walls of my room. I am thankful to them but i cant face the reality myself. They are smart unlike me. Sometimes i just envy them so much.

My gang all went back to their hometown. I was in a moody face before they went back. Now i wont be seeing them for a week till the next paper then after that paper i wont be seeing them for 5 month! I dont wanna leave a sad image for them or all my others fren before they go off for their training. So i am gonna put up a brave face and keep everything inside myself. I am gonna show them my smiling face so that they do not have to worry about me. Be brave mitchy!! Remember wat u always tell urself and other people. Laughter is always the best medicine so keep smiling and laugh....wahahahahahaha.............